One of the hardest things I’ll ever have to do is watch you love someone else. I genuinely want you to be happy, and watching you be happy without me is the most contradictory feeling I’ve ever had to sit with. I see you with them and part of me thinks good. Another part of me can’t stop asking why wasn’t I enough for that to be me? Both of those thoughts exist at the same time, and that’s what makes this so impossible. You’re celebrating someone’s happiness while mourning your own loss in the exact same moment. There’s no script for this kind of grief. There’s no way to mourn something you never officially had. The hardest part is wondering if you weren’t good enough. If you lack something they have. The timing was just wrong. Or if you were simply never going to be the one. I’ve learned that you could be everything someone needs and still not be what they choose, and that doesn’t diminish your worth, it just means the pieces didn’t fit the way you thought they would. Loving someone means accepting that their happiness doesn’t have to include you, that you can care about them deeply and still not be part of their story in the way you wanted. Wanting the best for them and wanting to be with them are two separate things, and sometimes you only get to keep one. Loving you is easy. But watching you love someone else has been one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do
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